Christmas shopping…
I went shopping with a list yesterday. I honestly thought I would be fine. But there were too many people…. and so I had a panic attack. I don’t know if it was because I was by myself and not able to focus on a person with me.
I kept on shopping not realising until I started getting dizzy that I needed to sit down. So I sat on a bench and put my head down and then I felt better soon after. Then I kept shopping! I went to a computer/electronics shop outside the main shopping centre and bought GA a new keyboard for his computer. I also bought my niece a small present.
The thing is, I really do like shopping. It is just that this time of year there are huge amounts of rude people. One thing that set me panicking was the fact that I couldn’t go directly to where I wanted to go because there were aisles blocked. So I would try another aisle, also blocked (with people that is. And shopping trollies. And prams (is it just me, or are prams really getting a lot bigger?)) Then I wanted to look at something and there were three people right there chatting and catching up on old times!
And because I am quite the wuss, I don’t say anything to get these people out of the way, like excuse me or something. Words can fail me when I am frustrated.
I may try and go shopping with my mum next time or one of the times before Christmas. She has a calming presence on me. Not like GA. We are as bad as each other and it must look quite comical to see two people trying to shop stressed out and close to meltdown. Fortunately for him, he has the luxury of being driven home afterwards - I have to drive him!
Filed by renaeden at November 27th, 2007 under Autism and me...